I sent a copy of yesterday's blog to my therapist Carolyn. She called me this morning with important feedback and words of wisdom for me. "Why" of Dow's behavior is the wrong question for you to ask." His behavior is illogical and irrational. My response was appropriate, contact the lawyer and let them sort his actions out through legal measures. End of story.
However it is not the end for my question gave me insight to Dow's and my relationship. I always asked myself "why" is Dow doing a, b, or c. I NEVER asked Dow nor demanded a clear concise answer from him on his motives and feelings DRIVING his behavior. For 30 + years I stayed stuck in the neurotic, co-dependent behavior of "IF I know why Dow is doing this, we can address it."
I am here to tell you folks, "It does not work, don't stay stuck in the "why." Address it head on or get out of the relationship. That is what I am doing way, way too late. Dow continues his behaviors.
Now I feel much better, thank you Carolyn, you are a blessing in my life.
Have a great weekend, I am looking forward to relaxing in the 90 degree heat of MN.
I have to carry an umbrella for shade! This 65 year old skin can't take the sun.
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2 comments:
Don't leave us hanging! What happened at the convention? I've concerned about what I've been reading and seeing about the demonstrations.
Kaylin,
I have a good report but I can't get the blog to accept it. It is in HMTL and so it shows up scribbles.
If you know how to get it to post or can get help for me, I will be glad to do it!
I had a great time but the violence against the marchers was extraordinarily nasty! I didn't see any of the brutality but certainly saw the aftermath.
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