A Grief Trigger

I haven't written this month as much as I thought I would. I have been traveling and the divorce is still "in process." Last year I was speaking for peace 2-4 times a month, this year I have been speaking only one time a month or so. I began to review/write for a presentation tomorrow at a Unitarian church on the West side of Chicago. I hadn't really looked at the material in awhile.

However, today as I reviewed Jason's injuries once again, (I haven't heard from or seen Jason in over a year (Christmas 06), I broke into tears. I was back at Walter Reed, standing by his bed, overwhelmed at the extent of his injuries, remembering Dow saying, "We just have to get by this" and my soul being mortally wounded by his words. How can I ever "get by" our own and the nation's complicity in the suffering of war?

Our human ignorance overwhelms me. Our wanting to keep a God of Light and to not acknowledge the God of darkness; of death and destruction as well as of creation. We live out of old paradigms of what it means to be human and "What is God like?" And we have taken the projection of our own internal darkness and put it "out there on the other" It is time to own our energy of destruction, from the one source of all that exists. To channel such dark energy to "destroy" poverty, to destroy disease, to destroy all that is not human in our own behavior. We need to evolve beyond war or else we all will be lost.