Moving Slowly Toward Settlement

Dow and I have been in negotiations via email.
Dow has talked to a financial planner and can afford to buy out my half of the condo.

Dow is attempting to control the maintenance payments after we divorce. I think and feel "What I decide to do with my life/living arrangements (except for marriage to another) after the divorce" is definitely out of his control or influence. Dow has dominated me using finances as the means of control for our total relationship. I see this as a continuation of that control after we have no legal relationship. We had to sacrifice everything "to save for retirement" Because I did not have a career position with income at Dow's request he quickly controlled all decisions. I won't even talk about Dow's "knowing best how to raise Jason."

I am financially dependent on Dow but he will not control how and where I live my life, 30 years under Dow's control is enough of a spiritual and emotional disaster for myself and I argue for our children. I do not plan to sacrifice my life any longer. I may receive a terminal illness diagnosis tomorrow I want to live my life working for peace. I do not want my grandchildren to ever think that the military is an option for their lives. Jason and Dow believed it was for Jason.

Dow can live with another or get remarried and in this way increase his household income. Dow was dating me prior to the divorce of his first wife. I cannot go back and ask for more income. What I receive at the time of the divorce is the end of any further obligation for Dow and I agree. I do believe very strongly that I am entitled to a portion of his income stream as I and Jason sacrificed in order for Dow create it. I got lost in Dow's need to gather income and wealth.