If you remember from an earlier entry I mistakenly believed after I agreed to the settlement that paperwork would flow fast and furious and the judge would sign a divorce degree today.
NADA, my lawyer never communicated with me after the September "court check in" Today after court, he sent me an email saying, "I have not completed a draft of the settlement..." So, that leaves me "up the creek without a divorce."
Dow very much wants the divorce to be final. I am sure he is antsy to begin adding to his retirement accounts. Dow stopped all deposits 1/07 as I am sure he did not want to share 50% of new accruals with me. Dow, too, I am sure is very interested in doing consulting to add to his retirement/pay for my maintenance and does not want me to be aware of any income beside his LU paycheck.
Dow was very secretive about money in and money out. Dow never informed that he had put $200,000 of consulting money into retirement accounts. I also was manipulated feeling that we were just "getting by." Dow's life mantra is "I'm a poor Idaho boy just trying to get by" he says it constantly to all. (This money could have been used to help send Jason to graduate school which Dow adamantly refused to do. A generous and supportive attitude toward our only son Dow did not have! A symptom of the dysfunction and toxicity of our relationship as husband/wife and as parents.)
I could not fight Dow as I never held a full time position at Dow's request and had access to no money of my own. We had agreed at the beginning of our 2nd marriage to each other that I would support Dow's career. This gave Dow power over me and Jason leading to a tragic and destructive family dynamic. Dow made all decisions based on finances or his own unconscious feelings and motives or patterns learned from his parents especially his father.
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