A Workshop for Living

I attended a wonderful workshop on Friday. It was offered by the spouse of Heartland's Volunteer Coordinator who is a therapist. I am not sure the title but the exercises were excellent and I thought I would share with you.

His basic premise is that we are "raised into negative responses to life." We spend our lives in fear but as adults we can choose differently.

One of the exercises he led was to have us answer individually the following questions:
1.How do you think you are going to die?
2.How do you want to die?
(If the two disagree, what must you change in your life so that you will die as you want to die? Then commit to living the change.)
3.Who will be there while you are dying?
(If someone you would like to be there would not be there because of your relationship, it is time to work to heal that relationship)
4.What will they write on your tombstone?
5.What do you want to write on your tombstone?
(Again, if there is a difference, now is the time to discuss it, to change, to live it.)

My answers to the questions
1. I will die of old age or cancer (both parents died of cancer)
2. Old age
3. Children, grandchildren, siblings
4. Katy's continuing her journey of growth
5. Mother-Grandmother-Sister 1943-

Dene also had us experience affirmations through having people speak them in both ears at the same time. Write your own affirmations "What would you have liked to hear when you were a child? What would you like to hear now?" Then have a person on each side of you speak into your ears. Do it once a day or week, or month. We need affirmation as our lives are based on "keeping busy and not feeling our emotions and feelings."

Affirmations include:
You are loving
I am proud of you
I love you inside and out
I sincerely trust you
You make the world a better place
If you knew me you would love me
You can get anything you want

Although I won't write it here, much of our discussion was based on listening to music, especially of our childhood, teen years. Dene says,"The words of songs go directly to the unconscious" and form our worldview and life. They are some of the most important messages of our early formation.

So of course there was lots of music from the 40's, 50's, and 60's-based on our ages. The emotional energy in the room did change as we reminisced through the years and music. We became "lighter." I haven't been listening to music but I know I need to to reconnect to the past. I really liked the music created after Vatican II.

Another exercise that he encouraged us to do is to write 10 memories of childhood. These memories have shaped our lives-maybe unconsciously. I have not yet done it but plan to.