Been a While for an Entry: Settlement Proposal

Sorry there hasn't been updates. My life seems to be going by in a blur.

Dow sent a proposal for divorce the week before our court check-in of 9/28.
My lawyer recommended that I reject it so I did.
We went to the court on Friday and the judge again took the lawyers in "the back room" to see if they could come to an agreement to present to us.

Dow accepted the proposed settlement saying, "I want this over."
I have till this week to ruminate and decide.
The settlement is in Dow's favor:
1. the maintenance is cut to $2500 a month(pretax for Dow) Dow received an increase in salary 7/1/07.
2. the maintenance is no longer permanent it is for ten years till I am about 75. Potential loss of suport $120,000 till Dow retires at 70.
3. Marital property and Dow's retirement funds is split 50/50.

My lawyer said, "You have $30K for ten years" no matter what Dow decides your support comes first.

So I have turned the settlement over to my financial planner to "crunch the numbers." I also serendipitously had scheduled an appointment with my Jungian analyst of 8 years for Monday. So by Tuesday I hope to have the numbers and "Where my heart/psyche is." Then I must decide if it is worth the risk of a new judge looking at the facts and the $20 grand to go to trial.

Say a prayer that I make the right decision. Dow will continue to get salary increases. I am worried about loosing my position as a part time chaplain; our census is the lowest it has been since I started in the position five years ago. My maintenance my quickly turn out to be what I live on.